Discerning our way in life is one of our most challenging tasks. To go left or right, through or around, here or there, life provides no shortage of choices. In his Nichomachean Ethics, Aristotle wrote, “virtue lies in our power, and similarly so does vice.” It seems, universally, the virtuous path is the difficult one.
The Gospel of Matthew (7:13—14) advises:
Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it. […]
Similarly, the Buddha observed that “bad deeds, and deeds hurtful to ourselves, are easy to do; what is beneficial and good, that is very difficult to do.” But not only is the way of virtue the difficult path; it is the path that cultivates our character. People like Seneca stressed, “Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body.” And likewise, the theologian St. John of the Cross suggested, “The endurance of darkness is the preparation for great light.”
To navigate life, to choose virtue over vice, the narrow gate instead of that which is wide and broad — is difficult, to say the least.
But to make this choice, one must understand the reason(s) for choosing the virtuous path. Even Marcus Aurelius wrestled with this decision in the passage on whether or not to get out of bed in the morning. Marcus ultimately concluded,
“At dawn, when you’re reluctant to get up, have this thought readily available I have work to do as a human being, and that’s why I’m getting up.”
What is your work as a human being? Why did you get out of bed this morning?
In the new book Daily Laws, author Robert Greene writes that we all possess an inner force that seeks to guide us toward our life’s work. The first move toward mastery is always inward — learning who you are and connecting with this inner force. “Mastery is a process, and discovering your calling is the starting point,” writes Greene.
There are many names for finding our way: e.g., calling, purpose or meaning to name a few. Finding our way in life is a perennial challenge since the future is uncertain, and we often know very few things for sure. But as the poet Mary Oliver pointed out, our lives our precious, “Tell me, what is it you intend to do with this one wild and precious life?”
Once you come to an answer to Oliver’s question, the next thing you’ll likely see in your path are obstacles. “If the path before you is clear,” observed Carl Jung, “you’re probably on someone else’s.”
Similarly, Marcus Aurelius wrote to himself in Meditations,
“Our actions may be impeded . . . but there can be no impeding our intentions or dispositions. Because we can accommodate and adapt. The mind adapts and converts to its own purposes the obstacle to our acting. The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.”
Let the idea of the narrow gate run in the background of your life for a few weeks. In my experience, there is always a narrow gate, and if we are honest with ourselves, the difficult path is often the way. The next time you find yourself faced with a difficult decision, remember the words of the Buddha, “what is beneficial and good is very difficult to do.”
One of the many beautiful things in life is that it comes one moment at a time (and one choice at a time). Although it is inevitable that we will make wrong turns and commit a few vices along the way. We must remember that it is never too late nor too early to start choosing the narrow gate.
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Thank you for reading; I hope you found something useful.
Until next time, be wise and be well,